Apparently, she would like a bedtime story

SK's dad calls Bella "Destructo Dog," which fits her in a number of ways like how her tail is conveniently at coffee table level and can knock everything off with one swift wag, and how she likes to eat entire plants that have never done anything to her. But she earned the nickname from Larry after she crashed head-first through the screen door on his sun porch. Keep in mind that this is just months after Larry almost lost some of the fingers on one of his hands to a fight with a table saw while repairing said screen door.

G-pa Larry was not happy.

She is in her kennel while we're at work so she was never allowed to roam the apartment without supervision. She's into chewing on her toys, but hasn't really ever tried to gnaw on furniture or anything of major value because we've always been there to stop her should she try. I have always been a little afraid of what she would do to the inside of our home, left to her own devices.

I found out during the week we moved.

During that insane week, we were back and forth between the apartment, the new house and my parent's house. It was such a pain to cart Bella's big ass kennel to and from each destination. Finally, on the last day of shuttling, SK and I decided to ditch the kennel and just close Bella into her room while we were at work. It was our last day in the apartment and we had everything in boxes, most of which were stacked almost to the ceiling in her room. I knew she'd enjoy having more room to move around during the time we were away, and tossed all her toys into the room before shutting the door and leaving the apartment.

Fast forward 9 hours.

I walk into the apartment to grab Bella and run to the new house. SK was already in Spring, waiting for me. I open the doors to Bella's room and about lose my shit as a result of what I am faced with.

Do you see her? Sitting there, licking her chops, excited about the fun she had, playing with books and boxes all day?!

SHE ATE THE WHOLE SIDE/CORNER OF A CARDBOARD BOX.
And yes, that is "Light in the Attic" by Shel Silverstein, and "The New Kid on the Block" by James Prelutsky. SK and I love reading them and realizing how twisted they really are. The illustrations really get me.

Lucky Bear's luck has run out.
Bella does this to any stuffed toy she gets--she eats the face off immediately. Doesn't even bother with the rest of the body once the face is gone. It's 100% creepy. When I fall asleep while she is laying with me on the bed or couch I always wake up in a panic, feeling my face to make sure she hasn't taken a bite out of it.

The demolished room, in all it's papered, slobbery glory.

*And yes, the ONLY boxes she tore into were boxes of books. Which, great, because she didn't tear up anything super expensive, but seriously? This mess was SUCH a bitch to clean up.