Just another reason to hate her...

Hi, my name is Cheryl, and I am an addict.

Hi, Cheryl.

No, I don't do drugs. I'm not an alcoholic...? Just kidding - no question mark. Alcoholics go to meetings, and I don't DO meetings. Seriously, though - no question mark.

I am addicted to Twilight.

Good Lord, I cringe even typing that.

It's not that I am ashamed of my addiction, because I'm not. It's the fact that, like many addicts, I struggle daily with keeping it under control. Seriously y'all, if it were up to me, I would have the movie playing 24/7, I would keep the books in my purse, and I would work Edward Cullen into every conversation I had, FO REAL.

Edward Cullen...not Robert Pattinson (I am a little revolted by HIM)...Edward. The fictional eternal teenage vampire. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???

I get that it's lame. And I get that, as a 26 year-old woman with a job and a mortgage I should have better things to do with my time than obsess about a whole world that doesn't even actually exist, but really, I can't help it.

I am an addict.

So when I hear people bashing my wonderful Twilight saga, I get defensive. We all know it's not real (well...most of us anyway...Newsflash, Tweeners - R-Patz biting you is gross. Get over it.) and we all know vampires don't walk among us, but to hate on us for being into it? Well personally, YOU have too much time on your hands!

Case in point, the wretched Miley Cyrus, getting all high and mighty about her disdain for the franchise:

"I don't believe in it. I don't like vampires. ... I don't like the wolf that pops out of the screen when I'm watching my TV at night. I don't like it. I don't want anything to do with it. I don't like the shirts. I don't like any of it. I feel really lame because everyone's, like, so excited (and) I'm like, 'Don't even talk about it.'"
via LaineyGossip

Jealous that you didn't get asked to be part of it? I think sooooo. Go throw your heinous blond wig on and magically transform into someone else for a while, because clearly THAT'S real enough for you.

Ugh. Boo, you whore.



**I get that this is me hating on her for hating on Twilight, but really, I just hate her.

Made my Monday

Today, this week, and the month of November got off to a rocky start as this morning, while cruising the Beltway on the way to work, I got pulled over and ticketed for my expired registration. Annoying, but also 100% my fault, so whatevs. To the courthouse I go, to pay the increased fine for being caught. Boo.

I was unexpectedly snapped out of my funk about a half an hour ago, though. I work on the same floor as a general practitioner's office so there are always random people wandering around our halls. I was headed back to my office and was caught behind an elderly couple, shuffling their way to the dr's office. They were cute, and walked next to each other, chatting about what to do with the rest of their day. The woman stopped in front of my office door and read the sign, mistaking it for the door she needed to go into to. I stopped a few feet back, thinking they hadn't noticed me, and waited for them to realize they were at the wrong door, planning on saying something in a few seconds.

Before I could get anything out, though, the man swatted her on the booty and said, "Helen, wrong door. Now you're making this young lady wait!"

Helen giggled. GIGGLED, y'all. She then took his hand and smiled at me. The man looked back at me and winked.

I about died from the cuteness.

Totally, totally made my Monday.