Honey, this guy said I won!

I won! I won! I WON!!

I won an award. For blogging. For writing about how I am feeling about a particular topic on a random day, or for telling you stories about how I once lit my car on fire, or how I beat up boys.

Or, as Heidi put it (in not so many words), how I have managed to completely master the use of profanity in every day story telling.

Thanks Heidi, for awarding me my very first blogging award.

Who would have thought I would win an award for TALKING? This blogging stuff rocks.

Some background on the super award I just won:

The Oops Award was created and is to be given to bloggers who inspire others with their humor and their talents, also for contributing to the blogging world in whatever medium. When you receive this award it is considered a special honor. Once you have received this award, you are to pass it on to others.

The rules for passing this honor on:

1) Pick 5 blogs that you would like to award this honor to.
2) Each award has to have the name of the author and also a link to his or her blog to be visited by everyone.
3) Each award winner has to show the award and put the name and link to the blog that has given her or him the award itself.
4) Award-winner and the one who has given the prize have to show the link of “Oops” blog, so everyone will know the origin of this award.

So YAAAYYY HOORAY me! I think I will take the day off and sip mimosas while letting SK fan me with palm fronds by the pool.

I'm going to award this nifty little guy to the following bloggers:

Step Into My World: It makes me so happy when you update your blog regularly--kill more time in the airports!

The Askew View: Holy crap, you've got opinions. Your blog spreads awareness and I love it. And I love phone dates with you, even though I suck at keeping them.

I Love Cats. No Really, I Do.: Reading your blog is JUST LIKE talking to you on the phone, so I still feel connected even though you're far away in grad school land. You're shameless about posting pictures and professing your love for your kitties, and even though I am not a cat person, you crack my shit up.

Kicking You From the Inside: Because new bloggy friends always deserve a "nice to meet you" award. Your blog is hilarious, and the photos of your kids are super sweet. See you Sept. 21!

Candid Carrie: The story you posted in the comment section of this blog had me rolling on the floor laughing. Your blog is witty and clever and I love reading it. Yay phun Phridays!


Also--thanks a bunch to all the new visitors! I haven't been great at commenting back to all of you who have stopped by, but I blame that on my lack of internet access at home (I am DYING without it), and the fact that I have to check your comments from my Blackberry, write up a new post at home on my un-Internetted laptop, save it to a USB stick, and then upload the post from the stick to my computer at work (shhhh...), and post it super quick in the morning. I will get better at showing the love as soon as someone can come over and fix my router issue. I will pay all those interested in the job in the form of cookies or Cheese-Its. Your choice.

Friday Foto

This is a photo of the 2007 Crane Christmas Party (1st Annual!), and includes all of my very best friends from high school, with some new additions. There's a lot going on in this picture and I'd like you all to note 3 very specific things:

1. Keith's face (guy 3rd from left). He is clearly in pain, as Aaron has just "nut-checked" him.
2. Aaron's face (guy 4th from left). He is grinning as only one on the giving end of a "nut-check" is wont to do.
3. SK's costume (back right). Yes, it's his Speed Racer outfit. Yes, I am aware it's not Halloween. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that's MY prize.


Just kidding, SK. You know I love you...foo.

Go to Candid Carrie to play every Friday! There are some great photos linked to her site. Thanks, Carrie, for giving me purpose each Friday ;)

Writer's Workshop Wednesday

Go HERE and play! I read her blog every day, but I didn't participate last week which means I am 1 homework assignment behind. It's cool...I was always a bit of a rebel anyway.

Ok, that's a HUGE lie. I am actually quietly freaking out over here about the fact that I am a homework assignment behind. BEHIND! I was such a dork in school that I did extra credit work because I thought it was FUN. Yeah yeah, make your jokes...I'm ashamed of me too. Fortunately, I am cool (lazy?) enough now that I am going to accept this and move on. I'll consider myself a new student, which means this would be my first real assignment anyway. SO THERE.

Letter to a 10 Year-Old Me

Dear Cheryl Ann,

You don’t know me yet, but you will. I’m 25 year-old you, which I’m sure is just blowing your mind right now, but we’ve always been one to catch on to concepts easily, so just go with me here. I’m here to tell you that while we’re not President of the United States (yet…? If this is still an aspiration of yours when you’re 18, I will caution you to probably not do anything in college but sit on your bed – alone – and do all of your homework…those tabloid people dig EVERYTHING up. Definitely don’t pledge Gamma.), we’re still kicking some major ass in this world!

Some tips for you:

1. You will be forced to go on a shopping trip with Dad right before 7th grade starts because Mom is out of town. Sounds fun, right? You KNOW he will buy you anything you want, and he does, so get excited about that. Problem is, you have absolutely NO TASTE at this point in our life, and you end up buying 3 striped XL Unionbay shirts in different colors. Devastatingly tragic. Please browse through a few fashion magazines before you embark on said shopping trip. You have a few years still to prepare. Also, take this shopping trip as a sign that Dad might be a little color blind. Be sensitive to this for the rest of our life.

2. You have wasted approximately 2 years of our life trying desperately to straighten out our hair. It’s got a lot of natural wave that activates at the slightest mention of humidity or rain. Let the hair run free…it’s not worth trying to catch up, and that guy you will like in your Chemistry class in 10th grade? He prefers curly hair anyway.

3. Be nicer to girls. They’ll be your biggest supporters and greatest allies in the issues we face later on. Try to learn now how to develop relationships with them—this will help later.

4. Start asking NOW to begin shaving our legs before 7th grade starts. Trust me on this. You might not care now, but if you don’t begin putting the pressure on to do this before you start Jr. High, you will be called all kinds of names due to the hairy legs. If you don’t get annoyingly persistent about it now, the parents won’t let you shave until after 7th grade is over, by which time the nicknames will be set in stone.

5. In the name of Jesus H. Christ, please appreciate the trip to Scotland we’ll take in 3 years. No, we’re not moving there, so quit the whining about how the “Coke tastes different” there, and how “pigeon is on the menu!” It’s a delicacy in many countries, you uncultured brat. Also, try a little harder to score some wine while you’re there or possibly some Scottish whiskey, you square.

6. We will experience the greatest heartbreak of our life (thus far—as for 25.5 and beyond, I can’t say yet) at 15. October 3rd is going to be a day that you’ll hate for a very long time. We move to Houston on October 3rd, 1998. This is going to hurt more than anything you’ve ever experienced before and honestly, I don’t know how to make it better for you, even now. Trust me, though, when I tell you that the parents didn’t do this TO us. They did it FOR us, and you have to try not to hate them for it. Our friends in California are still friends of ours today! All of them! Do your best to enjoy your time with them in the next 5 years and be grateful everyday for a group of wonderful people that love us and will miss us just as much as we miss them. Instead of shutting Texas out and mourning our life in California, be friendly. Despite the moodiness and bitchiness you throw around (which is not a good look for you, by the way), we made some amazing friends that probably would have been at our side earlier were it not for the perpetual death-ray glares we shot at everyone for a year. Know that you will get through this. Know that Mom and Dad do understand, and they didn’t mean to hurt us. Know that this is a place you’ll eventually grow to love, and it’s ok to let it become a part of you. Also know that even 10 years after the fact, the thought of the move still sometimes makes us cry, and that’s ok too.

7. Don’t stress out so much about finding a job when you graduate – we find an awesome one in the IT field, and you’ll love it. Mostly.

8. Your money-saving issue? You know, how you CAN’T? Yeah…that never changes.

9. You’re going to join a sorority. Don’t scream. You actually have fun.

Love,

Cheryl

6 things (Updated! See end of post)

Yay hooray! I've been tagged!

I have never been tagged by anyone in blogworld before. This is a big moment for me and I am going to revel in it.

I read blogs where people are tagging each other all over the place and honestly, I have always felt a little out of the loop. Like my blog just isn't cool enough to play. And yes, I am blaming my blog and not me directly. I like to deflect blame whenever possible.

But yesterday, Melody tagged me and made me feel cool and accepted and special. Thanks, Melody. You've single handedly given my ego a major boost that will likely last through the weekend, prompting me to feel confident enough to strut around my pool in my bikini (maybe with heels?) while other people are in my backyard, which is not something I enjoy doing lately because I've kind of given up on the exercise and the pounds? Do not fall off easily like they used to, but who cares--I got TAGGED and I am celebrating, so who wants another donut dunked in beer?


6 Random things about moi

1. I get goosebumps everytime either of the following happens: I drive on a high overpass, or when a semi drives by me on the road. Don't know why it happens, as I haven't had bad experiences with either, but sure enough on an overpass or by a truck, there they go. It's REALLY a party when I get passed by a semi while ON a high overpass.

2. I get really irritated when plans suddenly change. Not spontaneous plans (ie: Bar or house? House. No, bar.), but plans that have been planned out, y'know what I'm sayin? I get irritated to the point where I get 4 year-old style huffy and declare I don't want to go at all anymore, now that the plan is different than what I had originally thought it would be. Irrational? Yes. Immature? Very. I've been like this my whole life. I've gotten better at handling myself when situations like this arise, but I don't know how to make it stop.

3. I am very vocal about my absolute disdain for popcorn, donuts, cool whip and gummi bears. If any of the beforementioned snacks are within reach when I am hungry or bored, I will gladly take one.

4. Clearly I am fickle. This is why I have never gotten a tattoo. I can't think of anything that I would want permanently branded on my body. I think most tattoos are beautiful and I appreciate what they mean to the person who has them, but I am just too indecisive to get one. I stuck to piercings - at one point in my life, I had 9. Those are removable, tattoos are forever. Also, a needle jabbing into my skin for an hour sounds ten thousand miles from a good time.

5. My mom thinks I talk to dead people. When I was born, my great gma looked at me and told my mom I was special. Whatever, right? She's my great gma. She's bound to think a great grandchild is special. However, great gma (Dabu) was also a little psychic, or so said the family. She came to live with my mom and dad for a while after I was born to help my mom and dad out, which was nice for my mom but caused my dad to run every single night, running himself down to like 120lbs because great gma was a bit racist and disapproving of the Asian blood running through my father's veins. She passed away that Christmas and a few months later, my mom heard me talking in my room one night. She got out of bed, saw me sitting up in my crib, having a conversation with someone unseen, and she flipped out a bit. Asked me who I was talking to and I replied, "Dabu." Mom went back to bed because hey, great gma wasn't going to hurt me, but kept a close eye out for paranormal shit happening in my general vacinity. I don't remember it, but I wish I did. The closest 6th Sense account I have had that I can remember happened last year, when I dreamed of my gpa. He passed away in '99 and obviously never got to meet SK. In my dream, he shook SK's hand and nodded to me, saying "He's good." I woke up bawling, with a strange desire to get 2 stars tattooed on my right foot.

6. SK makes fun of the way I tell stories and leave voicemail messages. He gives me crap about always having to give a back-story, always making sure that the person on the receiving end knows how I came about doing what I was just doing. He laughs when I do it. I tell him to shove it. And then I come write long stories here, for you all to read ;)

Thanks for listening.

**In my excitement, I realized that I completely forgot to tag anyone else! I'm like the kid that FINALLY doesn't get picked last in dodgeball and is super excited, doing a little happy dance in the middle of the circle, only to realize too late that she isn't paying attention at all and takes the first ball thrown to the dome. I know, I suck and this just goes to show why I shouldn't play these kinds of games.

Tagging: Chandra, Karen, Liz, Heidi, Sorrelle, and Aunt Cheryl (get a blog!).

And I thought I had a good idea

For the last few years, SK and I have been saying that should we ever get so fed up with our jobs that we just can't stand it anymore, we're going to start up a little business selling turkey legs to people floating on the river.

Can't you just see it?

You're floating in your tube, drinking a cold beer, hanging out with friends and you realize you're missing something. Suddenly, you round a corner and BAM! There we are, standing on the bank of the river with a big ol' hunk of meat on a stick, waiting for YOU.

It's genius, really.

The only flaw (or maybe not...) in the plan is that the river is generally empty for 4 to 5 months out of the year, and while selling the turkey legs might be profitable, I really don't see us getting rich from doing it and therefore we might end up homeless in the winter months.

But then I saw these videos and realized that yes, I could find something to do to keep me busy during the cold months in Texas. Granted, I have no idea how much, if any, money these guys made doing this, but I how can you be sad with LEGOs and cards?

Go here for LEGOs

Go here for cards

Is it just me, or does anyone else wanna set up a big ass box fan right in front of the card-city Beijing?

(via geekologie)

Grr...

Ever had one of those days when you're so frustrated and burnt out that you shut your office door so that your coworkers will hopefully take the hint and just leave you the hell alone, but secretly you're hoping that one of them will happen to disregard the shut door and walk on in, ready to chat, just so that you can have an excuse to throw a heavy Swingline stapler right at their head?

No? Just me? Awesome.

Bumper Sticker Fun

You know you're in Texas when you see this on the back of an Explorer

Peas, yo

Saying goodbye has never been a big issue for me. I was fine in kindergarten when my mom dropped me off (likely, I scoped out the playground until I found some unsuspecting child that would let me boss them around), I was fine when I got dropped off at camp (again, with the bossiness), and I don't have major anxiety when someone I know is leaving for an extended period of time (sometimes even the bossiest need a break).

Why then, am I starting to feel like I am suffocating? I am about to take a 3-day vacation, starting tomorrow, and I will be far far from the Internet, which means I will have no access to e-mail, CNN.com, or blogs.

*GULP*

Seriously, the thought of being away from all the funny blogs I read is just about killing me. Notice I said "blogs I read," and not "the very idea of not blogging?" While I am trying to post more often, I'll be honest, the fact that I actually have a solid excuse not to for the next almost-week makes me smile.

;)

See?

Be back soon. Don't do too much fun stuff without letting me read about it first!

Flashback

Saturday evening I was going to pick Chandra up for a night out in the Montrose with Karen. I was sitting at a stoplight and noticed the small sign under the light, stating "Left turn only on arrow." I wondered for a minute about how old I would be when I finally couldn't read that little print anymore and suddenly, I was 17 again...

In Texas, when you get your driver's license, you have to renew it when you're 17, and then again at 18. After that, you renew it once more when you turn 21, and then you finally get the long stretches of non-renewal (5 or more years). For some reason, when we turned 17, I went to the DPS with Chandra to get her license renewed.

We stood in line, with her mom, talking and joking and being 17. The renewal process is fairly smooth - you walk up with all the necessary documents (don't ask, I don't remember what they are), they do a quick eye exam, and then you sign some stuff and you're off. Chandra gets up to the front of the line, gives them her paperwork, signs the forms and is about to stick her face in the eye test device. The stations are bolted to the front desk and look like giant, black View Master toys. She gets close, realizes something, and then looks back at her mom and me.

"I forgot to put in my contacts this morning. What do I do?"

The lady at the desk was looking less than patient. Chandra's mom urged her to go ahead and try to get it done anyway. Chandra looked nervous. I was cracking up.

She takes a deep breath and puts her head up to the View Master. I can see her shoulders relax as she realizes that, yes, she CAN see the stuff inside. She starts to read aloud.

"7, 4, 3, 9..."

The lady behind the desk jerks her head toward Chandra and then up at us, rolls her eyes and sighs heavily.

"Honey, those are LETTERS."

We pretty much ran out of the DPS at that point, me hyperventilating from the laughing, and Chandra's mom teasing her about not wearing her contacts. Chandra was more red than I have ever seen her. It was a great day.

Chandra is officially going to be my pace-setter for the sign reading question. When she can no longer read them I'll know that I have a few more years left before my eyes give it up. I'll confirm she is wearing the contacts, though.

Friday Foto

Because really, all you need is love.